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February 11, 2006

Bootleg MoDo

Posted by Phil on February 11, 2006 11:04 AM

Here's a secret: Karl Rove does not have powers of super-evil! Seriously! Sucker-punch that fucker in the sternum and he's as weak as a kitten--just like the rest of us! And Cheney? Aren't you tired of that goddam smirk? Whip his ass in ping-pong once, then see who's smirking! "Ooh--my Pacemaker!" Ha ha ha ha ha!

Sometimes it's worth it to sum it all up again. The New York Times, February 11, 2006:

Vice President Dick Cheney bitterly complains that national security leaks are endangering America. Unless, of course, he's doing the leaking, tapping Scooter Libby to reveal national security information to punish a political critic.

President Bush says he will not talk about specific security threats to America. Unless, of course, he needs to talk about a specific threat to Los Angeles to confuse the public and gain some cheap political advantage.

The White House says it has done everything possible to protect the homeland. Unless, of course, it hasn't. Then it can lie to hide the callous portrait of Incurious George in Crawford as New Orleans drowned.

The attorney general can claim that torture and warrantless wiretapping are legal, and can mislead Congress. Unless, of course, enough Republicans stand up and say, as Arlen Specter told The Washington Post, that if that lickspittle lawyer thinks all this is legal, "he's smoking Dutch Cleanser."

The president doesn't know the Indian Taker Jack Abramoff. Unless, of course, W. has met with him a dozen times, invited him to Crawford and joked with him about his kids.

The Bushies can continue to claim that the invasion of Iraq was justified because Saddam was a threat to our security. Unless, of course, he wasn't, and the Cheney cabal was simply abusing the trust of Americans to push a wild-eyed political scheme.

At the Bush White House, the mere evocation of the word "terror" justifies breaking any law, contravening any convention, despoiling any ideal, electing any Republican and brushing off any failure to govern.

[...]

Instead of just going after the 9/11 fiends, as W. promised with his bullhorn, the president and Vice President Strangelove have cynically played the terror card to accrue power and sidestep blame. They have twisted our values, mismanaged crises, fueled fundamentalist successes and violence around the world, and magnified a clash of civilizations.

[...]

W. and Vice have wasted hundreds of billions of dollars, turning Iraq into a terrorist training ground, leaving the 9/11 villains at large, and letting cronies and losers botch the job of homeland security.

[...]

In the new Foreign Affairs, Paul Pillar, who was a senior C.I.A. official overseeing Middle East intelligence assessments until October, says the obvious conclusion that should have been drawn from the intelligence on Iraq was that war was unnecessary. He says the White House "went to war without requesting--and evidently without being influenced by--any strategic-level intelligence assessments on any aspect of Iraq."

He calls the relationship between the intelligence community and the policy makers--you guessed it--politicized, damaged by bureaucratic rivalries, and dysfunctional.

At the risk of sounding partisan, I don't see any defending this administration's dishonesty and incompetence. What more does it take for responsible Republicans to see that the power in their party, though perhaps full of decent, respectable voters and representatives, has allowed ideology and impatience with dissent to metastasize into arrogance, corruption, and a blind greed for power?

Blah, blah, blah. Sounds like a broken record, doesn't it? Well, maybe some Republicans on the Hill are tiptoeing up to their responsibilities. We're counting on you, Specter and Hatch! Here's a secret: Karl Rove does not have powers of super-evil! Seriously! Sucker-punch that fucker in the sternum and he's as weak as a kitten--just like the rest of us! And Cheney? Aren't you tired of that goddam smirk? Whip his ass in ping-pong once, then see who's smirking! "Ooh--my Pacemaker!" Ha ha ha ha ha!

I tell myself that wild predictions of rising American fascism are cheap and ridiculous. "It couldn't ever happen here." But if Alberto Gonzales's performance before Senate Legal Affairs wasn't a contrived, fear-mongering, straw-man defense of authoritarianism, it sure did stink like one. And I've known a lot of mean, dumb, bigoted American bullies just waiting for the greenlight to beat up the weak, annoying, and different. Haven't you?

I know--"paranoid liberal chicken." But I'm going to be feelin' pret-ty fat and sassy when the Blackboots are marching up Main Street to shutter the presses, nationalize the banks, and put people like me in Liberty Camps out beyond the city limits. You'll all be getting a great big I-told-you-so then, boy.

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